Titles and Identities

Only two months away from Christmas…this year has gone by so fast.

I am sad – no – DEPRESSED, by how little art work I have done this year. I knew that being a parent would take some time away from my hobbies, but yeeesh…didn’t see it affecting me this drastically.

I’ve been struggling between my titles, lately. Mother, wife, artist, tattooist, gamer, foodie, human. Giving equal attention to all of these is difficult, if not nearly impossible. I’m hoping to take this month in between home fronts to collect myself and find some kind of balance. While I dislike living my life by a schedule, if I want to HAVE what I envision to be my life, I think that a schedule will have to happen.

Damnit.

And I do think that what many refer to as The Censor has a big part in my recent feet-dragging in regards to working. It upsets me though, especially when I know that I ENJOY drawing and painting and sitting down to work. I think that the free time I do get now is so precious to me in my head that I forget what to do. I sit down and put my feet up and forget about everything I need to do, and the things I want to do.

He says that its not worth getting stuff out, because who knows how long I’ll work? What if the kid gets into it? What if you get so tired after dragging it all out that you don’t do enough work to make the set-up worth it? I wish he’d just shut the hell up. And -I- just really need to learn to ignore him.

I’m working on a small body of work that will be playing off the idea of “Beauty Is The Beast” or “Beauty In The Beast”, something along those lines. It will probably consist of poems/lyrics, paintings, mixed media drawings, and possible a small handful of photos. I only have one small blurb written out, but so many images.

The lines too often blur / between monster and masquerade…

I am currently working on a “secret” (well, it was until the person requesting it be kept secret told people it was supposed to be kept from…haha) project that I delayed (based on another request by same person) and now am scrambling to finish before the end of the month. Essentially, I am illustrating alternating pages of a kid’s book that is being kept in the family. I am honored to be a part of it, but under a lot of pressure. In fact, I really should get off here and go work on that.

I’ll be returning to my World of Warcraft and Jillian Michaels podcasts. What kind of combination is that?

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